Don’t You Forget About Me

farewell, say goodbye, bye-3258939.jpg

I don’t know what it is but I finally feel okay. Like, I just know that no matter what, I’m going to be alright. This song came into my heart as I started to write this blog and it just filled me with hope and happiness. Us three little birds are going to be alright.

Today was a pretty good day. I had fun and I laughed and I booked a party, a vending event, and a fundraiser. I did really well in school the past week despite having to change things up due to a “mistake” with the internet disconnection dates. I got a lot done and well, I still have a lot to do tonight but it will get done. I finally felt my purpose in life is emerging and I’m not under a big, ugly, dark cloud. It feels good to see the sun after what seems like months and months of rain. And my Littles, wow. Nyala is like a new creature. The full sentences and big personality have come to the surface. She’s hilarious. Anaya’s got quite a bit of attitude, and she’s missing teeth. At four! Fun times!
I know there may still be a day or so when I’m unhappy but I really have so much going on right now that I don’t think I will have time to dwell on it. I have talked to God a lot lately. I suppose that is one thing I can thank Peter for. Even though I have my issues with God at times for putting him into my life, it may have been a way to lead me back to Him in the first place. I mean, if that was the intention, I can think of quite a few ways that would have been better, lol…eh, either way, I have accumulated some faith so it’s a start.

I’m not ready to look back on this and laugh quite yet but I’ve had so many conversations with so many people over the past few weeks and it’s really been quite an experience. People who I never knew or people I knew very little of have been amazingly supportive in varying ways. Discussions that had never once entered my mind have been brought up and I’m glad to have been a part of them. I plan to shine bright now. I’m so optimistic about what tomorrow holds. I feel good. I mean, I really feel like rays of sun are shining and I plan to soak them all up.

Over the weekend, I had a few friends over, including the mother of my ex-husband’s youngest son. First, I must say, I wish I had more Girls Nights. Second, it took us almost an hour to open one of the bottles of wine and I still need to find an electric corkscrew before our next Girls Night. Third, after going through what I just did with Peter, and further discussing with her the mess that the man we shared was, I have definitely found some commonalities and warning signs to look out for. Socially awkward men with little to no adult men friends are definitely guys to stay away from. People without friends are lacking something, normal people have friends. At least a handful. There were a couple things that Peter and Matt were alike in, but when I voiced that to Peter, he was very adamant about them not being anything alike, but looking back, they are so the same. Well, I will say that Peter is a bit of an upgrade but not by so much. Both of them were very much lessons. I hear it loud and clear now. Purpose has been served, my blessing will arrive one day, right, lol.
I think this may possibly be the last entry. Sad, oh, perhaps. It was never supposed to end but maybe it was never supposed to have started in the first place. What a ride it was. And yes, they had every right to call us crazy, we totally were. But it was exciting. And I can still smile when I think of some of those happy days, and happy times, and happy moments. We packed a lot into those three and a half months and I guess this is the point where I say I Survived and take that leap into discovering what I’m made of.

Don’t you forget about me…

I’ll never forget about you…

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