Packing It Up
He packed up some stuff today. It’s all just strange anymore. He seems excited to be getting a small one bedroom house somewhere. He packed up a few crates, did some laundry and hit the road. He continues to say he is sorry. But I don’t know anymore what exactly he is sorry for. So […]
This!
http://https://youtu.be/7YvAYIJSSZY
Apologies
Well, I guess he isn’t leaving this weekend. I mean, why can’t he just have a simple and honest conversation about anything. Why all these lies. It makes no sense at all. He got home, took his shower, and was headed out the door when I asked about him moving this weekend and he was […]
The Loneliness
It’s pretty lonely around here for the most part. I dance around and jump around and act crazy but most of my days are simply lonely. No kids, no Peter, not much of anything. And yesterday, for some reason, I had a minor break down. I got up and started the crockpot…a nice big pot […]
You’re Home?
I always ask him if he is coming home, but I know he won’t. The last night he slept in this house was weeks ago, December 11th actually. But I always asked. Just to see what he would say, probably. I mean, what did it matter at this point? I’m well aware he has a […]
Pretend It Never Happened
Below is a portion of his side of the hour and a half long talk we had… I can’t be here when you’re here because I did f*ck up. I freaked out and I’m sorry for that. I was in a really bad situation when you met me so I moved way faster than I […]
Eff You
Music is my outlet. When life is bad, I turn to music and let it soak up my pain. I usually hope that it makes me feel better and with the kids gone and me, home alone, it’s been helping a little. Not enough but a little. The Eff You Playlist: 1 – Lily Allen […]
Merry Forgiveness
When I work up this morning and started playing my music, I actually took the time to truly listen to what this song said…these lyrics in particular: Love my enemies, forgive the past and set ’em free so I can free free up the things every blessing God has for me see it’s for me, […]
His World Falling Apart
I don’t think he knew it was coming. And I almost felt a little bad, only almost. After all that he had put me through over the past month, in a way, his world falling apart was necessary. He needed to have some sort of situation happen where he might see the hurt and pain […]
Open Arms, Open Heart
Day 105 For the past two weeks, I have watched this love that deeply invaded my heart and soul and mind spiral into something I couldn’t imagine. I watched the man I love with all my heart turn into someone and something I couldn’t recognize. I watched life show it’s presence and just as quickly […]