This!
http://https://youtu.be/7YvAYIJSSZY
Apologies
Well, I guess he isn’t leaving this weekend. I mean, why can’t he just have a simple and honest conversation about anything. Why all these lies. It makes no sense at all. He got home, took his shower, and was headed out the door when I asked about him moving this weekend and he was […]
The Loneliness
It’s pretty lonely around here for the most part. I dance around and jump around and act crazy but most of my days are simply lonely. No kids, no Peter, not much of anything. And yesterday, for some reason, I had a minor break down. I got up and started the crockpot…a nice big pot […]
You’re Home?
I always ask him if he is coming home, but I know he won’t. The last night he slept in this house was weeks ago, December 11th actually. But I always asked. Just to see what he would say, probably. I mean, what did it matter at this point? I’m well aware he has a […]
Pretend It Never Happened
Below is a portion of his side of the hour and a half long talk we had… I can’t be here when you’re here because I did f*ck up. I freaked out and I’m sorry for that. I was in a really bad situation when you met me so I moved way faster than I […]
Eff You
Music is my outlet. When life is bad, I turn to music and let it soak up my pain. I usually hope that it makes me feel better and with the kids gone and me, home alone, it’s been helping a little. Not enough but a little. The Eff You Playlist: 1 – Lily Allen […]
Merry Forgiveness
When I work up this morning and started playing my music, I actually took the time to truly listen to what this song said…these lyrics in particular: Love my enemies, forgive the past and set ’em free so I can free free up the things every blessing God has for me see it’s for me, […]
His World Falling Apart
I don’t think he knew it was coming. And I almost felt a little bad, only almost. After all that he had put me through over the past month, in a way, his world falling apart was necessary. He needed to have some sort of situation happen where he might see the hurt and pain […]
Open Arms, Open Heart
Day 105 For the past two weeks, I have watched this love that deeply invaded my heart and soul and mind spiral into something I couldn’t imagine. I watched the man I love with all my heart turn into someone and something I couldn’t recognize. I watched life show it’s presence and just as quickly […]
Trying to Fix This
So, he didn’t home home last night. Sent a message this morning letting me know he was okay and sorry. I’d told him that if he didn’t want to be with me, all he had to do was say so. I begged him to tell me he was seeing someone else so this would make […]